


What Will They Say Monday at School?

by looneymoony



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: College, Fluff, M/M, POV Third Person Limited, and some slurs too so !! be aware, i hope y'all enjoy it anyways, this got really out of hand really fast like wow way off course, watch out!! its got homophobia !! weird mean kids
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-02
Updated: 2015-11-02
Packaged: 2018-04-29 15:37:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,998
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5132936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/looneymoony/pseuds/looneymoony
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ok, just because your blind date bailed doesn’t mean we can’t have a good time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What Will They Say Monday at School?

**Author's Note:**

> Originally Written: October 16, 2015  
> Tumblr Source: http://looneymoonyreblog.tumblr.com/post/131289626026/damn-it-who-the-diddly-darn-dickens-gave-you-the  
> Written in response to a prompt, as follows:  
> "Psst.....I'm not sure when you put out that prompt ask, but could you do one with the two going to the drive-ins"  
> damn it who the diddly darn diCKENS GAVE YOU THE RIGHT TO GIVE SUCH AN ADORABLE PROMPT   
> this kinda turned out to be more of a third-person perspective piece and way longer than i thought it would be but i still think it works so i’ll call it "what will they say monday at school?"

_DING-DONG_.

Stanford jumped, almost falling out of his chair at the sound of the doorbell. He heard a snicker from the other room. Blushing, he stood up and brushed himself off, checking his hair in the mirror one last time before opening the door to his dorm.

A tall, dark-haired figure towered over Stanford in the doorway, clutching her purse tightly to her body. She was dressed in an oversized periwinkle sweater with fringed heel boots covering her blue jeans. Big, loose curls bounced off her head and over her shoulders. She smiled half-heartedly down at the young man a few inches below her, but to Stanford, she seemed miles above him. He gulped.

“H-hi, you must be Donna,” he stuttered, sticking out his hand. He accidentally poked her chest. Her smile fell a bit at the unexpected contact, but she reluctantly accepted the gesture and shook his hand.

“Yes, that’s me… you’re Stanley, right?” he shivered.

“Heh… Stanford, a-actually. Stanley is myyy…” his words drifted away. He found himself staring at the ground.

Donna glanced down. “Are… you alright?”

Stanford’s head shot up. “Excuse me!” he fell back into his dorm, slamming the door behind him. He collapsed onto the floor, breathing heavily. A scruffy blonde head peeped out from the other room.

“Everything alright, Stanford?” asked McGucket. 

He clutched his chest with his six fingers and exhaled slowly. “I can’t do this.”

His roommate scoffed and stepped out, leaning against the doorframe. “Sure you can. It’s just a date. Hell, it ain’t even a real date. It’s just a movie.”

Stanford felt his heart beat faster. “A movie isn’t a real date?”

Donna waited on the doorstop, sighing lightly. Dates were never easy at Backupsmore, and as usual, this one apparently didn’t realize that she could hear everything he was saying through the door.

“Aw, c’mon, you know that’s not what I meant,” she heard the other man cross over to Stan and slump down next to him. “Look, it’s just an hour and a half of film, then you drive her home and maybe give ‘er a kiss if it’s right. You don’t even have to converse with her that much.”

Stanford laughed hoarsely. “You make it sound so easy.”

“That’s because it is!” insisted the other man. “It’s just like goin’ to see a movie with your family or your friends. Didn’t your parents ever take you to the theatre?”

There was silence for a moment. Donna cocked her head as she tried to make out what Stanford - or was it the other man? - was muttering. A few more moments passed, and she heard Stanford laugh (genuinely this time). “Thanks, buddy.”

The door opened, and Donna stood up straight, smiling down at her… wait a second. That wasn’t her date. That must be his roommate. And she wasn’t smiling  _down_  at him, he was actually more eye-level to her, even though he was slouching to an incredible degree. He grinned. “Hey there!” Her heart dropped. She didn’t like where this was going.

Stanford walked out from behind the taller man, jangling his keys around his finger. “Okay! Everybody ready?”

Oh, no. “Uh…  _everybody_?”

Her date-to-be faltered a bit. “Yeah! My buddy, Fiddleford here, is coming with us.”

She grimaced, looking over to the blonde man, who shrugged.  _Great_.

* * *

 

“No, right! Turn RIGHT!!”

Donna squeezed her eyes shut as the car swerved in the opposite direction, tires screeching against the pavement.  _Just an hour and a half_ , she recited to herself.  _Hour and a half, hour and a half, hour and a half, hour and oh my God why me?_

The car shuddered to a halt, engine puttering as they waited behind a few other cars. “I didn’t realize we were going to a  _drive-in_ ,” said Donna.

Stanford smiled at her with feigned confidence. “Yeah, they’re lots of fun! Don’t you think?”

She folded her arms across her chest. “I guess. I’ve never been to one before.”

“Whaaat?!” Donna flinched as Fiddleford leaned forward from the backseat. “How come?”

Donna looked the taller man over with a thinly-veiled scowl. “The regular theatre was closer.”

The car inched closer to the gate. “Well, you’re in for quite a treat, missy. Prepare yourself for a bonafide drive-in experience!” she did her best not to jeer at that. It was hardly going to be a  _real_  drive-in experience with a party of three. Still, these were her plans for the night, and she had to have _something_  to tell her friends about the next day.

Finally they reached the ticket booth. An older woman peeked out and smiled at the sight of the young college students approaching her. “Good evening, kids. Just two tonight?”

“Three, actually,” chimed in Fiddleford, poking his head forward. Donna winced as she saw the woman’s smile waver, but both of them kept quiet.

“Alright then, that’ll come to a total of eight dollars,” she said, holding out her hand.

Silence.

Nobody moved.

A cough.

Eyes darted around.

Donna felt like she was going to scream.

Finally, a nudge in the ribs. “Ow!”

“Go on, give her the money,” Stanford said.

Donna hardly believed what she was hearing. “What?”

“We can’t go in if we don’t pay,” said Fiddleford. Donna couldn’t suppress her groan. She rifled through her purse, finally pulling out eight dollars and shoving them into the ticket woman’s hands. Leaning over, she slammed her foot on the gas pedal, thrusting the car forwards alarmingly and causing everyone else to jump back in fright.

“Keep your hands on the wheel, Stanford,” chided Donna. Stanford’s brow started to sweat as he nodded and shakily drove the car into the lot. He parked in the back end of the theatre.

Donna glared out the window, bouncing her foot irritably. The movie hadn’t even started yet and already this was one of the worst dates she’d ever been on.

“What’s the name of this movie, again?” asked Fiddleford, who was now peering over his roommate’s seat to look at the screen.

“I don’t know. It’s some B-rated horror flick,” replied Stanford. “Do you remember, Donna?”

“I didn’t even know we were going to the drive-ins,” she said dryly. Both of the men fell silent. 

The car was quiet for a while. Donna prayed to God that she would either fall asleep or, better yet, suffer a massive case of amnesia that eradicated all memory of this ‘date’. Finally, it seemed that the film was starting up.

“Ohhh, I remember this one!” said Stanford, eyes lighting up. “It’s  _The Creature From the Black Lagoon_!”

“No way!” Fiddleford leaned even further over the seat, his gangly arms awkwardly wedged in between the headrest and the window. “This is a classic!”

Donna rolled her eyes and looked forward at the show.

Or, at least, she  _would_ , if she could see past the car in front of her.

“Hey, Stanford. I can’t see,” she said, leaning in the other direction.

“Really?” he asked. “Here, scoot closer. You might see it better over from this angle.”

Donna felt a little bit better as she sat herself on the center console, leaning against her date. This was actually alright. Sure, it was uncomfortable to have three people, but this guy seemed nice enough, just a little weird. There wouldn’t be a second date, but maybe she could do her best to enjoy the mo-

“Hey, Fidds. Is it true that the creature was based on an actual archeological discovery?”

Or maybe not.

“Are you kidding? No, that thing was designed by a make-up artist.”

“I know that, but I thought I heard that they actually found a skeleton that looked like this, and that’s what inspired the movie.”

“Stanford, I can guarantee you that there is no such thing as a lake monster, and if there is, I’ll make sure to file it right next to all my UFO sightings.”

“Haha, lighten up, McGucket!” he said, pushing his friend’s face away. Fiddleford shoved him back, laughing. This carried on for a few minutes while Donna sat on the console, or as she liked to call it, Hell. Finally, she grabbed her purse and got out of the car.

“I’m gonna get a snack. Do you guys want anything?” she asked. Neither of the men responded. They were too busy laughing. She grunted and shut the car door.

“A cola and a popcorn, please,” she sighed and rested her head in her hands as she leaned onto the counter. The kid behind the stand had a head of red curls and couldn’t have been much over sixteen, yet the look on his face gave the impression that he had endured sixty years’ worth of torture.

“That’ll be two fifty,” he said, opening the cash register. Donna whimpered a bit and opened her purse. She pulled out two dollars until she realized that she’d only brought ten with her on her date.

She slammed her face against the counter. “UUUUUUUGH.”

“That’s alright, miss. I know how it goes. I’ll cover it, okay?” he pried the two dollars out of her clenched fist and put them away. Donna didn’t move.

“Bad date?” he asked as he poured a soda into a paper cup. Donna peeled her face away from the surface, mildly amused at someone so young asking her how her date was going.

“Yeah,” she said, deciding to indulge him. It would feel nice to get it off her chest, anyways. “My friend set me up with her classmate who’s supposed to be this incredible boy genius or something, but it looks like I got stuck as the third wheel.”

The kid - Scott, his nametag read - handed over her soda and continued preparing some popcorn. “Seriously? He’s already got a girlfriend?”

Donna laughed and took a sip. “Actually, he brought along his roommate.”

Scott passed her the little bag of popcorn and cackled. “No way! You got set up with a faggot?”

Donna chuckled at the concept. “I hadn’t thought about it that way, to be honest, but now that you mention it…” the two locked eyes and both cracked up. Someone leaned out of their car and told them to be quiet. Donna took another sip of her soda.

“Naw, but seriously, he’s just a chicken,” she said, taking the popcorn in her free hand. “He doesn’t really get romance, you know? Poor thing was too scared to go it alone. Probably hasn’t ever even been on a date before.”

“And by the sound of it, he probably won’t be going on another one, at least with you,” said Scott. Donna smiled.

“You got that right,” she said. “Thanks again, kid.”

“No problem,” he said. “Enjoy your movie.”

_He really isn’t that bad,_ thought Donna as she headed back to the car.  _He’s just a recluse, that’s all. He’s not a jerk, and he’s certainly not a fag-_

She stopped dead in her tracks.

* * *

 

“Were they…?”

“Oh, you bet they were.”

“Stanford and Fiddleford were… !”

“Yep. Those two were osculating.”

“Osculating?!”

“Swappin’ spit, canoodling, call it what you will, those two were doing it and they would not let go of each other,” Donna kicked her feet up on the table and took a long sip of coffee. Her roommate was in hysterics. She couldn’t tell if she was laughing or having a seizure.

“Oh, my  _God_ , Donna, that is  _too rich_ ,” said Janet, sitting herself down across from her. She folded her legs and leaned forward. “Then what happened?”

Donna gave Janet a knowing smirk from over her mug. “To be honest, I just turned around and left once they hit the floor.”

Janet could not stop laughing. “Oh my God! I’m so sorry! I can’t believe I set you up with a  _fag!_ ”

Donna giggled a bit, too. “It’s alright, Jan. These things happen.”

She finally regained some of her composure. “Still, what I wouldn’t give to know what happened afterwards! Oh, man, how did I  _not_  see it coming…”


End file.
